Member since April 2015.

Carlton Tedford

Day 565: Schedules/Goals/Plans

I’ve lived my life preordained for so long, where all I did was follow suit to doing whatever I was told, as the right thing to do and I hated it, but didn’t know what else to do, so I conformed to a certain extent and when I got the chance, went off to do my own thing, I mean... —

Day 564: Weathering the Storm

It’s pretty fascinating how back in the American Indians ‘Hay Days’ some of the elders would be able to look up at the sky and say, a storm is come and people would see this as some form of Mystical/Magical power they possessed, when all they were doing was looking off in the ... —

Day 563: More on Attachments Pt.2

Now I’ve attached myself to quite a few things throughout my life, but none more than my mind and it’s interesting how this attachment works because no one ever talks about how we are/have been/being controlled by the mind we’ve attached ourselves to, with emotional and feelin... —

Day 562: More on Attachments

Have a Look Back – Attachments Day: 185 (A quote from what I see) “My phone is like an extension to my arm, if I don’t have it ready to interrupt the boringness of being Here and Now, I’ll go crazy, as I need this sort of attachment to grade who cares about me, by the number o... —

Day 561: What I think you Need (Self-Forgiveness)

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have thought that I knew what you, you and you need, being the people in my life in my past that I would spread my assumptive beliefs onto, as to what I think they needed to do, hear and say, when all I was doing was ... —

Day 560: What I think you Need

Have you ever had the experience of someone thinking they know what’s best for you/what you need, where commonly speaking, people would say things like, I know exactly what you need, “You need a vacation” after being told about a moment at work, or “You look tired, you need so... —

Day 559: Soliciting Reactions Pt. 2

What I see as the difference between Soliciting Reactions and Soliciting A Reaction, is that with soliciting reactions, comes from my mind, in the form of bringing up continuous thoughts back to back, as what I experienced and shared in my previous post, verses Soliciting A Re... —

Day 558: Soliciting Reactions

It’s interesting how my mind find things (in ways) to bring up within and as me in order to solicit a reaction from me, as the innated trigger point to our inevitable demise, if I don’t open my eyes to see/realize what’s going on within us, which was the case throughout the ma... —

Day 557: Let’s Talk About Me Pt.2

The interesting stories we tell, as the stored memories we exist as, is always the highlight of a conversation when meeting someone New or being introduced to someone New, within that the excitement of meeting someone New, brings out the need to hear what’s being said, so when... —

Day 556: Let’s Talk About Me

Making a good impression around those you’ve just met is one thing, but when making a good impression is abided with “Let’s talk about me”, changes the dynamics of things, being that I’m-pressing myself to come up with a character to make myself look good in front of others, w... —

Day 555: The Title Eludes Me (Self-Forgiveness)

This is a continuation from the previous post, where I’ll open up more Self-Forgiveness on these point; I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have separated myself from other in the sense of looking down on them, disassociating myself from them, no longer... —

Day 554: The Title Eludes Me (Why Me First)

Just because someone continue to do what you no longer do, doesn’t give you the right to look down on them, shun them or not interact with them, in any social setting, gathering or form of party etc. A lot of times we find ourselves not wanting to associate with people for the... —

Day 553: The Start Never Stops

How many times have we carried our troubles over into the next day, just to miss out on what the New day has to offer, where we wake up with a congested head full of thought from the previous day, then end up re-hashing/replaying/re-living the same patterns over again, that op... —

Day 552: Back Chat (Self-Forgiveness)

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to split myself in two entities, myself and the voice in my head that I believe acts I the best interest of me, telling me to rebut what I hear from other and/or that I make up in my mind, that causes confusion and confl... —

Day 551: Back Chat (Simplistically Put)

That little voice that comes up in your head when you don’t have balls enough to say what you really want to, to the person you were talking to, for self-interested reasons such as fear, and/or the snobbish mummer no one can make out, as you turn around with your head down and... —

Day 550: Erasing Regret

The most interesting thing about regret is how we’ll do things in order for others to regret having done things to us, stating this is why you shouldn’t have done this that or the other to me, and it doesn’t have to be negative in nature, it could be as simple as presenting yo... —

Day 549: Regret

How many times have you said the words; “I can’t believe what I did”, “Only if I would have…”, that caused some form of consequence in one way of another in your life, that the Idea comes up of wanting to go back and Re-Get yourself back into the same or similar situation as b... —

Day 548: The Fine Print

More like the underlying point. If our minds came with an operating manual, do you think we would change the world, or would the manipulation of using it against each other become so great, that we would all just dissipate, simply because we’ve forgot to read the fine print? T... —

Day 547: Intimidation (Self-Forgiveness)

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have lived my day being timid, in fear of things that I’ve heard and saw in general and of others that would lock me in a cocoon of emotions, shying away from interacting and/or participating in and within situations ... —

Day 546: Intimidation Pt. 2

Interesting point of a look, is when you are unaware of your facial expressions in the moment then find that someone was intimidated be the look on your face, although your intentions wasn’t as such. This was the case for me, plenty of time where people would tell me, you look... —

Day 545: Intimidation

The loud talk, the screaming, the fear, the dirty looks and rumors that we hear, In -Timid- I live my-Day and at nights I have nightmares, I shy away from people that’s bigger than me, looks different than me, that’s a different color than me, I mean they look so angry, but if... —

Day 544: Mistaken Assumptions

Just because someone is not dressed to your level of afford-ability, doesn’t mean that they’ll come up and ask you for money, things are not what they seem nowadays, the wolf in sheep’s clothing has traded it in for a tuxedo, so to speak, where everything is right out in the o... —

Day 543: Looking Vs Experiencing

Pulling up a chair with a bag of popcorn watching life pass you by, often times seem better than actually participating in it, being that of an observer verses being a participant, seem to be a safe way of looking at thing, the same as looking for something to say, instead of ... —

Day 542: Hidden Resentment (Self-Forgiveness)

Have you ever played Hide and go seek where NO one ever found you, where they look all around in the obvious places, (on the surface) but you’re not there, and then because you’ve hidden yourself so well, they get bored with the game and want to give up/not play anymore, and y... —

Day 541: Hidden Resentment Pt. 2

More Deconstructing – A composition of an act easy to follow, playing out the emotion of hidden resentment, was the score of my life, creating piece after piece, unaware that I was doing so, because I didn’t realize the power that hidden resentment wills through manifestation,... —

Day 540: Hidden Resentment

Telling yourself that I’m over it is not a solution or resolve to the way you feel about someone who’ve done you wrong in some way or another in the past. We tell ourselves Yes, I forgive them, but then when we’re alone by ourselves, looking back at the situation, we tend to f... —

Day 539: More Self-Forgiveness on Guilt

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as guilt throughout my life, unaware that this guilt has limited me in a way where, I’m not seeing certain thing that I should, in order to correct and change my everyday living. I forgive myself that I have acc... —

Day 538: Visiting the Past Vs Re-living The Past

Often time when looking back at the past/visiting the past, what tends to come up is the words, “I wish” or “Only if I would have”, where we somehow think that if we would have done things differently back then, we would be living a different outcome today, which is not really... —

Day 537: Suppressing Guilt

In the previous post, another dimension was opened up in relations to my Shutting down in a split second, here’s for context; After looking deeper into this point what was found is; Suppression, suppression, suppression, when getting a reading from Kim A, where what came up is... —

Day 536: Shutting Down in a Split Second (Self-Forgiveness) And some…

This is what I saw initially. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have experienced myself dozing off and falling asleep, as a child sitting in church, because of the perceived point of not wanting to hear what was being said. I forgive myself that I hav... —