Member since April 2008.

Bio

Have been watching videos since the beginning, started to participate a bit after. Stopped for a relationship then joined back again mid 2010.

Paul Quessy

Day 409 - How I Create Stress as Self Abuse Part 2

I would like to touch upon another dimension in relation to this point of creating stress as self abuse and this dimension is in relation to putting my personal interests first. A while back, I believe it was the day that an influential person in my reality died, I had a drea... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 408 - How I create Stress as Self Abuse

Stress is quite prominent in my life at the moment because I have attached a form of stress towards moving myself outside of my pre-programmed ways, like anything that I do not have previous knowledge to or a complete understanding about I associate stress to. And what is unfo... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 407 - Hiding SCS

I commit myself ot when/as the word no comes up in relation to a thought that I am not wanting to face or simply wanting to avoid that thoughts are coming up in that moment and not wanting to face that I am within the mind at that moment, to breathe in that moment and use the ... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 406 - Hiding SF

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to myself in fear of what comes up within the mind, wherein I am not allowing myself to become and live the directive principle of/as myself but to submit to the mind and allow the mind to direct myself by accep... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 405 - Hiding Part 2

In the last post about hiding, I was writing about hiding from others and keeping quite so that I could keep the mind to myself and keep the mind secret from others. Another point has opened up recently and that point is that I hide from myself, I hide from facing myself wit... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 404 - Hiding

I am commonly the person who will stand back from conversations and interactions with other people, keeping myself quiet, letting all the other people do the talking and laugh every once in a while to show that I am there. This point isn't about social ineptitude, but more so ... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 403 - Resistance Towards Responsibility SF and SCS

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place desire over responsibility so that when/as I am waking up in the day, if the first thing on the mind is what I have to do during that day, I automatically feel gloomy and resist starting the day and moving my b... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 402 - Resistance Towards Responsibility SF

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I am resisting responsibility when working on something that is not within the preprogrammed design I am making life much harder on myself than what it `needs to be` and if I accept the experienc... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 401 - Resistance Towards Responsibility Part 2

In the last blog I left off with looking at the reason behind/within the resistance to responsibility and the reaction of feeling down and separated from the people around me, from myself in the movement of the responsibility that I am resisting, and from myself, and what is n... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 400 - Resistance towards Responsibility

When I need to do something that is in alignment with the definition of responsibility a weight comes up within the body upon the thought or attempt to move within that responsibility. In this context responsibility is something that is not pre-programmed within me, such as wo... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 399 - Relationship Self Support Part 2

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blind myself by the want/desire for a relationship and the energy existent within each image or thought related to the want for a relationship - from seeing that the image and thought is showing me something about mys... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 398 - Relationship Self-Support

Throughout Process, so far, and my life, so far, the want for a relationship has been a pressing point for myself to face. I have written about relationships and the desire for relationships numerous times, yet the point still remains and still remains to be a constant conside... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 397 - Porn and Sexual Attraction SCS

I commit myself to stop myself from allowing the thoughts and images of porn, be it within/as porn or while walking down the street and seeing a provocative advertisement, to have influence over how I will direct myself in that moment and in this I commit myself to continue to... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 396 - Porn and Sexual Attraction SF

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create sexual attraction towards the images that are presented in the media which are designed to stimulate sexual attraction, not realizing that the images being presented and the thoughts that are attached to them a... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 395 - Porn and Sexual Attraction

I am a person who has participated in porn for much of my adult life and the imagery associated with porn or the sexual attraction defined within the images of media, which is able to stimulate sexual attraction within the mind,consequences for myself in this life. Consequence... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 394 - The Nice Character

For the most part I try and be nice to everyone I meet. I will be polite, respectful, and try to not cause any type of conflict between myself and the other person. This is practical to a point but, recently I have been noticing that I am not able to show a person an entire st... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 393 - Walking into real change Part 2

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to entertain the thoughts that persist when stopping a habit, and to give more attention to the thoughts than to myself within/as the starting point of changing/stopping a habit When/as I am stopping a habit and it has ... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 392 - Walking into Real Change

Most people fear change, they fear going into the absolute abyss that accompanies change. When we change we have to stop participating in the same patterns that we have been participating in for however long we've accepted ourselves to participate in said patterns. In this we ... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 391 - Competition

Within the point of competition I find that I am very defensive of myself in regards to competition. When I am approached with the point of competition, like if someone says "I can beat you at a race" I will defend and justify reasons as to why I would win the competition and ... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 390 - Depression and Self Movement Part 2

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that while waiting to be directed I am in fact accepting myself to be depressed upon/within/as not moving myself from self will and thus to state that depression affects me is a statement of self-dishonest... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 389 - Depression and Self Direction

Recently I have been experiencing bouts of depression. They spur when I am doing nothing physically practical with my time like when I am sitting and watching movies for example. While I feel depressed I do not find value within anything; it all seems mundane and worthless to ... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 388 - Sleep

My sleeping pattern has gone quite awry as of late and it is something that I see needs to be corrected into what is practical and best for walking any responsibilities that I have to complete during the day. Right now I am working on the night shift which means I start work ... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 387 - Distractions SF

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to distract myself with thoughts I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become distracted by thoughts, misleading myself from seeing what is real and what is false as I give attention to the thought... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 10 - Death and Diabetes

For the most part, death is commonly on the back of a diabetics mind because there are thousands of different pathways to end up with complications such as kidney failure, loss of eyesight, loss of a limb, and neurological degeneration, and it can be something that will plague... —adiabeticsjourneytolife.blogspot.ca

Day 386 - Distractons

Recently I have been distracting myself from process. I have been playing video games as if they were my religion and I have been distracting myself with thoughts about the game as well, like I will be thinking about the game and develop an energy towards playing the game whic... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 385 - Socialization Self Commitments

I commit myself to when/as I find myself in the situation of socializing when I do not want to and am in the position of compromising myself in order to socialize with people to breathe in that moment and take a stand for myself in/as making the decision to walk principles of ... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 383 - Socialization (redo)

In the post Day 381 - Socialization, what I wrote was a reaction to events in my life and I wrote from the perspective of only writing about the problem and not the solution and obviously this wasn't helpful towards walking myself within/as a solution or for readers reading th... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 382 - Self Forgiveness on Socialization

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to talk shit when I am socializing with other people wherein what I speak about has no substance to offer, no words of self honesty, no words of support I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to social... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 381 - Socialization

In the past few posts I have been writing about imagination and how I go into the imagination and think about random scenarios and allow myself to start to believe the imaginations and ideas that I create within the mind. For the most part I imagine being in social situations ... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 380 - Wanting to Socialize

In the past few posts I have been writing about imagination and how I go into the imagination and think about random scenarios and allow myself to start to believe the imaginations and ideas that I create within the mind. For the most part I imagine being in social situations ... —paulsjourneytolife.blogspot.com