Rebecca Dalmas

Day 631 Oblivion: the sense of being disregarded or forgotten. Feeling overwhelmed experience.

Oblivion: The state of being disregarded or forgotten. Feeling overwhelmed. I am the measure of what I accept and allow. The memory of me, as the measure of me, determines the movement of me here. If I have a voice in my mind, as a measure, as an entity, as a thing, though ... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 630 Am I the automation of my beliefs, opinions and ideas? Do I i consider all life?

So often I notice that I fear telling the truth, the real common sense measure of this physical real world where I live my life.. In little things even, as though making things clear is somehow ‘ bad” or ‘ offensive’. Really a form of insanity on a practical physical world. I... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 628 Going into Positive Value.

Going into the positive value, I notice how going into a positive value is defining a moment without really looking at many implications of what it means to get to the idea that is the positive value. I am so acclimated to being idealistic that being the practical steps to ... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 627 Reviewing Spite which is Fear.

I am looking at the word ‘spite.’ It is different from blame. Spite is to have a desire to hurt, annoy, or offend someone. It is having a feeling of contempt for someone. Contempt is a feeling that a person or a thing is beneath consideration, worthless or deserving of scorn; ... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 626 Self Pity is Self Righteousness

Self pity is self righteousness. At time I go into self-pity, which is really a form of self righteousness, because after I have believed something as been done to me, or something has not moved in he way I expect. I move into self pity, which is making what I believe to be a... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 625 The measure of myself here.

The measure of myself In dealing with people and presenting the measure of my understanding, I react. It is as though the patience to follow through, to let go and to move with the measure of what is here is not fluent. This means I am getting stuck on beliefs, opinions and... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 624 Allowing pressure to define me. A rage of belief.

Pressure I notice that I allow myself to believe that I am under pressure to perform. Within this I go into fear, because I go into comparison and then I begin to build beliefs about how things are moving around me. I lose myself in becoming fixed in my definitions within thi... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 623 The Circulation of Blame is Self as Life in Abdication.

http://www.nationofchange.org/2015/04/03/states-fail-to-properly-manage-fracking-waste-says-groundbreaking-report/ The circulation of blame. How is it that we fail to manage what is here on this earth as physical things that are how we exist here, because without them, wit... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 621 Presence as mind only or presence as Equality to life? Which is the choice of freedom?

When I am playing in a Chamber group, I have to listen to all the parts, and the whole, like I am the parts and thew whole. Depending on where I sit, I also have to pay attention to the movement of the bow of the section leader and/or person in front of me, because the bow can... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 619 The FearObligationGuilt of Doubt separating myself from using out to cross reference reality.

Doubt. There have been times when I face limitation, and I begin to doubt. Sometimes it is moving into self judgement, as an act of comparison to limited values, I stop and I breath, I slow down, I accept myself as who and what I am in as far as the shape of my nose etc. But... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 618 Remember in School when you really just wanted to particpate?

http://www.aljazeera.com/blogs/middleeast/2015/03/wont-read-piece-syria-isil-iraq-isis-150317125900133.html Remember in school when you really just wanted to participate? Remember wishing you could speak up and interact? I think this is the real nature of men. I see it in ... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

The limitations of our thoughts as knowledge and information only, and the suppression of our presence.

Accepting the form of sound structures and aligning them to the whole. I live in a world of information given through words, as human language. Words describe, they paint pictures of things. They sound what is here, be it the physical or some ideological metaphysical constru... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 615 Mindfulness follow through into writing out thoughts, self forgiveness and corrective application.

I listened to a talk about a practice of ‘ mindfulness.’ This is where a person slows down and breathes as thoughts come up in their head. It is to realize that the thoughts coming up in one’s head are not who one is. This was likened to a globe filled with water and somethin... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 614 Where is your presence? Journey to Life.

I realize that so often I find myself imagining worst case scenarios, or having a conversation covering an imagined reaction in facing limitations. Limitations being ideas about what is real and what is not real within one’s perspective of life. Mostly this is how one defines ... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 613 Self Forgiveness on this Morning's Rant. I am what I accept and allow.

SF on Suppression I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear following through, to fear moving out of agreement within a narrow focus in perspective of reality with others. I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have made the mis-take of real... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 612 Despair and Space and Time, Self Forgiveness

Despair, I have been talking with my son about relationships and reactions when facing other people. I gave him some perspective. I realized later that the perspective I gave him I had not applied myself, or had applied recently and discovered something about being patient a... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 611 The courage of water

The courage of water I have had a problem in my chest for a while. It has taken time to begin to slow down the protective shield based on ideas, beliefs and opinions. And, that what I have allowed is so habituated, as my actions, in reaction based on fear, which is myself acc... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 610 The False Positive of the Halo of Piety

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tI-LDQCmW5E&feature=share “ Pity is about how deeply I can feel, and in order to feel this way, to experience the rush of my own pious reactions, I need victims the way an addict needs drugs” wrote the the late political theorist Jean Bethke... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 609 The Worry for Security

So much of my time during the years with my children was worry about remaining stable and being secure. This was in tandem with watching my children. From the time my second child was seven this was a large part of what I worried about. Even when my children were really small ... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 608 Not seeing the connections right in front of me. Judgements as beliefs as mind con-sciousness.

I was at this meeting; a new group. I listened to the women speak and then at the end of the meeting, began to talk individually with various women in the group. I realize that I had, in the course of the group presentation, unconsciously picked which women I thought I should... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 606 The Living Word Grounding us Here in Equality

I had a phone conversation with a business man, who complained that no one knows their words anymore. With the use of expediting words within texting words, abbreviations have become a norm for younger people. But, like our cultivation of plants, that over time, as the Americ... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 605 We are programmable, which means we can change.

I was sitting and talking with someone the other day. From the onset of the conversation this other person told a story about what they wanted, and what their father wanted for them. By the time I finished talking with them, my impression of what they wanted completely changed... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 604 The Misplaced Creative Ability of The Concrete Made Abstract. Self Forgiveness

I recently had an interaction with someone, where the creative ability of a person can take parts and create a picture, built of beliefs, and opinions and ideas, to construct a justification around having made a choice. If I look at this as an ability, it reveals how humans ar... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 603 The resiliency of silence

Trying to cover too much ground at once. I notice that I don’t always “ pan out”. I tend to focus on one thing, and forget to notice the world around me. But this is like a tunnel vision, one that zeros in on what catches my eye. So, how do I slow down and pull back and take... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 602 Understanding the space and time of practical existence, communicating here. Self Forgiveness

Understanding the space and time of practical existence, communicating here. Back to the basics of self forgiveness in every moment I speak. I find that I can communicate more readily with others, even within evaluating limitations and speaking up, but still I can move into... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 601 Real Cyber Attacks are the Presentational Use of False Dilemmas

I realized in the years that I practiced an instrument that any and all emotional values I allowed during my focus within the act of practicing remained. I had to be clear, I had to have a focus that was what I would call total. We as physical instruments are exactly the sam... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 600 The veil is thin. The practice of value touting vs. practical application.

I had a conversation with some people and reacted when they continued to tout their point of view. I went into a reaction as a non-reaction within just realizing they were being egotistical. They were presenting one dimension that was not necessarily wrong, but really very lim... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 599 Who I am within the culture of woman. Day 5 Self forgiveness and Self Correction.

Day 5 Who I am within the culture of women. I have been so busy reacting as being in expression of judgement as imagining that I am not being substantiated- all of which is based on self defining labels, that I have distracted myself from my own common sense. I even fear th... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 498 Who am I within the culture of women. Day 4 Self Forgiveness and Self Correction

This is a point of projecting value judgements onto situations and the objects outside of me as those involved in the situations that are actually normal interactions I must walk logistically in space and time. All of this is a form of protection and self defense based on a se... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Day 496 Who am I within the systemic culture of women Day 2 Self Forgiveness and Practical Application

My reactions to women commiserating cont. Day 2 Going down that road of commiserating, leads to more problems than it is worth, or so I believe. Situations such as this are fickle and can change in a heartbeat. I believe that such creates a burden where one should be there w... —awidowsjourneytolife.blogspot.com